Monday, September 20, 2010

The Yuuzhan Vong

  Yeah yeah, the Vong. Alot of people hate em and think they ruined Star Wars more than the God-awful trilogy (if you don't know why they're awful, check out Red Letter Media's Star Wars Plinkett reviews). For those of you who don't know, the Yuuzhan Vong came to the Star Wars galaxy in giant planet-sized ships called Worldships.

                                                                                        a World Ship
                                                                            

The Vong, in service to their gods, deemed all technology evil. If you don't know by know, the Yuuzhan Vong, for their ships, weapons, armor and stuff like that use genetically engineered plants to do stuff for em. It's pretty awesome. A hanful of their most notable items are the Amphistaff, a snake that can stiffen up and be a sharp ass staff and shoot venom, then curl up and strangle a bitch, and the pain. Yup, the pain. They loves the pain. No seriously, it's part of their religion to accept pain, because it is an unavoidable byproduct of change. Yup, they mutilate themselves for giggles. Sick bastards... Kinda like Reavers, Firefly anyone?

                                                            It's some Yuuzhan Vong warriors.

SO, they launch a campaign on the New Republic (the government that sprung from the rebellion after the fall of the empire), owning the balls out of them with their superior technology, till they're whittled down to their core systems. So the New Republic wins and stuff happens. What? You want more? Go ready it, lazy. Aaaaaaaanyhoozle, after the War, the New Republic becomes the Galactic Alliance for osme reason or other. Also they don't use centerpoint station at Corellia because Jacen is a giant faggot and Luke is a pussy.

END.

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